It’s finally over!
I’ve blogged about “So You Think You Can Dance” (both American and Canadian versions) before. It definitely is one of my favourite shows. Period.
This season, however, blew chunks to put it mildly. It sucked donkey balls. It was all kinds of not awesome. Sigh.
This was not the dancers’ fault. In fact, I thought that this Top 20 (save for a certain married couple and HSM alumnus) was one of the strongest. It’s too bad that TPTB (The Powers That Be) – both real (i.e. Nigel) and immaterial (i.e. fate) decided to make this season the most cursed one ever.
How was Season 6 bad? Let us count the ways.
1. No Mia Michaels
During Vegas week, Mia was quoted as saying “Season 6 is going to blow Season 5 out of the water!”. Then, she left the show, presumably to work on other projects. But, then we hear that she is committed to doing Season 3 of SYTYCD Canada. WTF? Did she have a premonition about the upcoming train wreck? We’ll never know. But, her stellar choreography, candor, and tough love was sorely missed. The moment she told Legacy that he was “stupid” was golden.
2. Bogus Top 20
Paula Van Oppen had just missed the Top 20 previously. She is a fantastic talent and even seemed to be destined for Top 10. However, she TURNED THEM DOWN because she had decided to do a movie with Christina Aguilera instead. So, that enabled Ashleigh (all pink lipstick and fake smile) – who wasn’t originally chosen for Top 20 – to slide in. Are you kidding me? How was that not manufactured? There’s a few weeks between Vegas and the taping of the so-called “Green Mile” episode where they determine the Top 20. You can’t tell me that Paula didn’t already make her mind up about taking the role. Why couldn’t she have told the producers before the taping? Because TPTB wanted drama, dahlings. Also, then SYTYCD would also have their first married couple on the show. It’s all about the ratings.
3. Holy Honkin’ Stage, Batman!
The new stage was a travesty. I’m all about improvement. But, this set was BAAAAAAD! The big video backdrop was distracting. The stage itself was huge and made the dancers look lost. All that intimacy between the performers and audience was gone. Bad form Nigel.
4. Season 6? Try Season Sick
There seemed to be an inordinate number of injuries this season. We get it. It happens. These performers are working extremely hard so the physical and mental toll must be crazy. But, jeez. First, Billy Bell had to withdraw from the competition due to (suspected) mononucleosis. Then, Noelle wrecked her knee and got a free pass to the following week. Ellenore tore her rotator cuff and the choreography had to be changed to accommodate her injury. Ashleigh popped her shoulder out and WAS STILL UP FOR VOTING EVEN THOUGH SHE DIDN’T PERFORM AT ALL! The eventual winner, Russell, wasn’t immune either. He somehow injured his ankle during the final results show and couldn’t perform. Proof that this season was cursed.
5. No Voting? Frak!
For the first two weeks there were no results shows. After the performances, the judges chose who had to dance for their lives. This was actually not unusual. They did this in Season 1. If you don’t remember that season, it’s okay. No one else does either. Anyhoo, the reason they did this was because TPTB were unable to fit a second show in the same week because of the World Series. Whatever. This smacks of bulls**t because there was NO way that the judges would have chosen the weakest dancers to be in the bottom. They chose their favourites to pimp out a long time ago (i.e. Mollee a.k.a. Cindy-Brady-On-Pixie-Sticks). So, on the first show, Brandon Dumlao (who was cut in Vegas) was asked to fill in for Billy. He had one day to learn a smooth waltz. And, you know what? For a hip hop guy, he wasn’t bad. He certainly wasn’t the worst that night. Nonetheless, he was picked to be in the bottom. Totally bogus. Then, they chose Russell to dance for his life! Are you freaking kidding me? Did they not see Phillip slaughter (not in a good way) that jive? Brandon was the obvious choice to go home that night. He was just filler. Nigel’s grandiose showboating about maybe changing the rules to allow Brandon to audition again for Season 7 was painful. Hello? You’re the executive producer for crying out loud! Honestly….
6. Fake Crying Equals Votes
Okay, this had nothing to do with TPTB. This was a ploy used by Ryan (a.k.a. Hugh-Jackman’s-Long-Lost-Brother-With-The-Personality-of-Sawdust) to garner sympathy votes for his wife who was not allowed to perform due to a shoulder injury. Some said that it was sweet and touching. Call me heartless but it just made me want to gag. If Ashleigh couldn’t dance, then they should have shown some of the rehearsal footage so that viewers would have something to vote on (this was done on “Dancing With The Stars” last season). But, they didn’t! People fell for the muscle head’s crocodile tears and voted to see the couple dance together in the finale. I am especially bitter about this because it meant that my man Legacy would not make the final cut. Conspiracy.
Those are just a few of the reasons why Season 6 sucked. I didn’t even mention how frustrating it was to see the judges constantly overpraising Dweedle Dee and Dweedle Dum (Nathan and Mollee respectively) even though they were the weakest dancers on the show. I didn’t even get into how some of the choreography doomed some of the dancers. I’m looking at you NappyTabs. Nobody wants to see aliens dancing hip hop. And, is it just me or did the whole season seem rushed? We had a Top 6 instead of a Top 4 because of it being so close to the holidays. Also, the final performance show was only an hour long as there were no group dances or intro packages. Bad, bad form.
Despite all that brouhaha, there were a few stellar routines and some fantastic talent was showcased. Will I watch Season 7? Of course! I’ll be there with vodka in hand.