What The Twit?

All I hear about these days is Twitter this and Twitter that. This is the latest thing in social media. I never did MySpace or Asian Avenue. And, it took me a while to get into Facebook and blogging. But, I refuse to jump on board this Twitter thing. I don’t care if Obama and Kanye do it. I will not submit.

twitFor those who don’t know, Twitter is a service that enables people to stay hyper-connected thorough the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing?

Who the hell cares? I have never wondered what my loved ones are doing every five minutes. Why the flying eff would total strangers be concerned about my business?

RESISTANCE IS NOT FUTILE!

However, I will do a mock simulation. You can tell me if my everyday meanderings are worth following. Please note that all times are approximate and that a proper Twitter page looks nothing like this. I have no graphic design skills whatsoever. I would actually start at the bottom and work up to the top in order to see how my day unfolded. Tricky!

Post, have a beer & then off 2 bed. Wonder what tmrw will bring? about 2 minutes ago from web

Silver 4 Patrick. Bronze 4 Joubert. See Brian? You don’t need quad. Should’ve learnt your lesson last yr. Wk on your footwk & transitions 4 nxt yr. about 45 minutes ago from web

Figure skating on. Go Patrick Chan! Joubert can suck it. 11:59 PM Mar 26th from web

Yay comments! Must ans like a good blogger. Gonna change Page headings up top 2 single words. Much cleaner & Zen-like. Also adding RSS feeds. 11:01 PM Mar 26th from web

Finally hubby is off computer! Telepathy does work. 10:05 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Bedtime. Awwwwww 9:22 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Should b in bed by now but his cuteness is spellbinding. Can’t resist. 9:15 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

He took some steps! He took some steps! Now he’s on his ass. Lol. 9:12 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Hell’s Kitchen or Drag Race? RuPaul wins! Queens over chefs any day. 9:00 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Buh-bye Mike! 8:58 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Almost 4got Idol results! Should b Mike, Scott & Megan in bottom. Any of them can go. Their performances were subpar. With singers like these, who needs Ambien? 8:38 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Hope baby doesn’t realize we missed In The Night Garden. Should start PVR’ng that stuff. With shows like this, who needs drugs? 8:31 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

I want a new kitchen! These cupboards gotta b 20 yrs old. Honestly! Must start saving now. Granite is hella expensive. 8:12 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Running a bit behind on baby’s sked. No time 2 mk baby food. Methinks he’ll be getting a Gerber lil entree (aka TV dinner 4 babies). Bad Mommy! 7:58 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

While putting produce in cart am reminded of how women r Gatherers & men r Hunters. Luv how evolutionary biology rears its ugly head. 7:12 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Ooh! 4got this Walmart has Grocery Shelf. Must look around. Don’t look @ books, don’t look @ books. Got 2 many books. Resist 6:32 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Finally off! Going 2 place that has No Frills & Walmart. Boys can look @ toys & electronics while mommy gets sustenance. 5:58 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

We’re going out! Hubby & baby need to wash and get dressed. Est time out the door = 1 hour. Sigh. 5:04 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Hold up. We have 2 watch The Wiggles. Really don’t understand the appeal. These guys creep me out. Real people r not this happy. 4:01 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Lunch is scrambled egg, cereal & mango. Baby eats healthier than I do. So not fair. Mom gets coffee. REALLY NEED GROCERIES! 3:30 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Baby’s smile = BLISS. In 15 years this will be replaced w/scowl & disdain. Must b prepared 4 day when I’m no longer cool. Sniff. 3:02 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Reading Tweak by Nic Sheff. Have your kids read this. They will NEVER want 2 try drugs. So-called kids lit is excellent nowadays. LUVS IT! 1:14 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Naptime! 3 hrs of serenity 12:15 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Entropy is a measure of the disorder of a system (goes fr low to high or fr order to disorder) & can be demo’d by baby w/blocks 11:31 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Baby attached 2 boob now. How long is this going to last? REALLY need 2 change this feeding time 2 8 AM for when I go back to wk otherwise baby comes 2 store in sling! 11:02 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Reading paper with baby wrapped around my leg. Miss those days when comfort can be had by holding onto Mama. 10:32 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Dang! We really need groceries. Leftover chicken and rice for brekkie. Yum! 10:25 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

AAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! 10:16 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Getting up. Hope hubby had the foresight to make a pot of java. Otherwise neighbours will hear hysterical screaming. 10:14 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

S’ok. Hubby got him. Yay hubby! I love my…zzzzz 9:20 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Still in bed. Can hear baby. NOOOOO! 9:17 AM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Do you Twitter? Or is it Tweet? Does anyone realize how silly it sounds?


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About myra36

parent, housewife, advocate, diva
This entry was posted in blogging and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to What The Twit?

  1. Anonymous says:

    Thanks for adding me =) I didn’t even notice until just now >.M
    You know it’s such a coincidence that we both decided to talk about not jumping on the twitter boat on the same day around the same time.

  2. materix01 says:

    Wow, thank you so much for adding me =)
    It’s such a coincidence that we both posted something about twitter on the same day around the same time. Check out the video at the end of my last post.

  3. Dickey T says:

    Awesome. Is there a way I can link this with our post at stupid answers? We also need some questions from women, so we are not a site full of testosterone :)

  4. Lubi :) says:

    haaa haaaaa haaaaa :D u r hilarious m’dear!!

  5. altari says:

    That’s your whole day?! Goodness, I’m not alone in this world… except the ‘Gerber’ and the ‘beer’ parts :)

  6. I confess, I’m on twitter. And sometimes the stream of nonsense is similar to your mock simulation. But you don’t have to follow those people. I have met at least 5 amazing people via twitter and landed 2 jobs through contacts I’ve made on twitter. I’ve also learned a lot about social media marketing and blogging through posts with links to great articles. Plus, it’s another way for me to stalk Anthony Bourdain. :)

  7. BTW…forgot to mention that I agree that all the jargon sounds ridiculous. Tweets, Tweeple, etc…. but one that hasn’t taken off but that was suggested by someone I follow…the past tense of “tweet” should be “twat”. That’s good stuff. :)

  8. I know. Who gives a freak about what these peeps are doing 24/7? I know nobody cares about my every move–and if they did. I’d be thinking–stalker!

    • myra36 says:

      Too true! It’s like these people need to validate what they do every second of every day. It’s as if they’re saying, “If I’m followed on Twitter, I exist.”

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