Shut That Kid Up Already!

You’ve seen it before.You’re casually shopping at the mall when some little kid freaks out about God-knows-what and the parent just goes about their business as if nothing is happening. You try to ignore it but the urge to punch the kid in the back of the head is almost overwhelming. Or maybe you are that parent, hoping that the little f**ker would just shut up already without you having to actually do anything.

Why do some parents loathe to do anything when their kids spazz out in public? Here’s a few reasons:

1. Disinterest

Remember when you first got a puppy? Or a kitten? You were all over that little bugger for the first few months. Then they got bigger and messier. If you didn’t take the time to train them, they didn’t listen to you. That bundle of fluff just became an expensive ball and chain. Once they stopped being cute, you looked to something else that would hold your fascination – i.e. Play Station, Wii, fire, etc.

The problem is that some parents are part of that TV generation that needs constant stimulation. In the beginning, kids are really cool and interesting. Then parenthood starts to wear thin and grate on the nerves. Unfortunately, the law requires parents to feed and clothe these buggers for another 17 years. If you are looking forward to days of fun and adventure when you have your first child, then you need to change your definition of “adventure”. Try an eco-tour.

2. Denial

This is not just a river in Egypt. Ha, ha. Parents find it easier to disacknowledge their kid’s demon behavior than to do anything about it. They believe people who complain about their child’s lack of social graces are whiny, hyper-sensitive, heartless non-breeders. They delude themselves into thinking that their kid is perfectly fine and that nothing is wrong with their own parenting skills. Parents in denial also understand that their kids are a direct reflection of themselves. So, any attempt to correct the child would be an admission of a personal flaw on their part. Hell, no! So, they cope by going to that happy place in their minds. Copious amounts of weed and booze help too.

3. Disgust

How can you possibly feel disgust for a poor innocent child that you helped bring into this world? But, let’s face it. Kids are filthy and covered in germs. Ick. Also, kids aren’t all that innocent. Children are born as pure sociopaths. Parenting is all about turning them into functional human beings. Good luck with that.

4. Fear

In this age of photo-taking cell phones, the threat of someone calling Children’s Aid prevents parents from disciplining their kids. Childless old women are especially dangerous in this regard. They pay attention to everything happening around them simply because they have no lives of their own. These bats live to f**k you up just so they can have something to talk to their cats about. Children get away with s**t because reprisal from the government is drama that some parents can’t be bothered to deal with.

5. The other parent

Parents like to alternate. I changed his diaper twice already. It’s your turn to feed him. I bathed him last time. All these things take a certain amount of effort. Administering discipline to a child takes time and nerves of steel. It’s also tiring and soul-sucking. Obviously, it’s much easier and desirable to just push that s**t off onto somebody else – even if that somebody is in another part of the mall.

6. They want to be the centre of attention

People will do almost anything to get noticed. Hello, Octomom! The quickest way to say “Look at Me!” is to let your kids run amok in public. These parents live for drama. Why else would they have children? Others might be talking smack about them but at least they’re talking.



About myra36

parent, housewife, advocate, diva
This entry was posted in parenthood and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Shut That Kid Up Already!

  1. 1kaykay1 says:

    Lol, great post!! Totally agree with you, most parents where I live let their children run rampant in stores.. destroy various store items..etc. I don’t like getting too close to them, since sometimes they will touch me with booger fingers!

    • myra36 says:

      Thanks for dropping by 1kaykay1!

      It kills me when I see kids run around too. I worry not so much for the destruction of property but for the kids’ safety. Sheesh!

  2. Evenshine says:

    There are many other reasons, as well. Some parents have had super-bad days. Some are so stressed by the economy that they can barely get themselves out of the house. And for every time you’re sitting in judgment of someone else’s parenting skills (or lack thereof), you’ll have one of those days, too, where for any number of reasons, you don’t do what that other parent would have done. I say mercy!

    • myra36 says:

      He, he. I actually wish my kid would act up in public. I’m one of those sadistic parents who likes to disturb other shoppers. Plus I work in retail so it would be my subversive way of getting back at crazy customers. No such luck though (so far). Just kidding! Lol.

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