(first written Saturday, March 1, 2008 at 10:30pm)
So, I got up as usual on Friday. As I wasn’t going anywhere, I was lounging around in my pjs. At around 1pm, I felt a GUSH between my legs. Immediately I thought, “That can’t be pee!”. I told my hubby that my water broke. As he was WAY into his online computer game, he didn’t believe me. But one look at the puddle on the floor, he realized that I wasn’t kidding. However, since I wasn’t having any contractions yet, I figured it would still be a while. So, I slapped on a maxipad and proceeded to get ready for the hospital. My hubby must have been in denial at this point because he went to bed instead of putting the bloody car seat in!
Anyway, I first felt contractions at 3 pm but it was still nothing to write home about. I continued to go about my business. Finally, the contractions became regular at around 9 pm. I remember this because the hockey game was still going. Stupid Leafs! At this point, the contractions were about 10 minutes apart. Again, I figured I still had time. At 11 pm, the contractions were short, sharp, and coming every 5 minutes. I finally paged my midwife. When she phoned back I told her my symptoms. She said I was in active labour and should go to the hospital. My husband was finally awake at this point and immediately rushed down to install the car seat! I still don’t think it’s in right!
We got to the hospital at about midnight. My midwife met me in the ER as the dad-to-be was parking the car. We went up to the Family Care Centre. I was assessed and told that I was dilated about 4 or 5 cm. I was then stripped down, put into a hospital gown (drafty!), and placed in a birthing suite.
Some of you may have heard that contractions are like menstrual cramps. I wouldn’t know because I’ve never had any. BUT THEY HURT LIKE HELL! As I got closer to the time I needed to push, I was ready to bang my head against a concrete wall and eat glass.
At about 2 am, I started pushing. At this point, I was drenched in sweat and delirious. I was told to take a deep breath and bear down like I was taking a crap. Okay, you know how when you’re constipated and passing a fat one hurts like crazy? Try multiplying that by a thousand and covering it with suicidal hot sauce. That’s KINDA what it’s like to have a baby. After what seemed to be the LONGEST half hour of my life, my son was finally in my arms and bawling like mad. Beautiful.
After the paperwork was filled out and our baby declared perfect, we were discharged at around 6 am. We got home and realized that nothing was ready since I wasn’t expected to pop until the 23rd. But that’s okay, we have a whole lifetime to get ready. I think.